"You made the right choice"

I wish I could blog about every single thing that happened to me, but I can't. My entires are excessively long as it is. I wish I could make people understand how it was, how it has been, but I know that I can't. Before I left for Europe, I was so scared. I didn't know if all the money, time, and energy would be worth it. I felt guilty for leaving my family and costing them so much money so that I could go see and do things that they themselves might never see and do. I was scared to leave Nashville, afraid that everyone would forget about me or that I would miss big happenings. I was scared of being in a foreign country and traveling around with a bunch of immature college students. I was scared of getting robbed. I was scared of a lot of things.
I remember in orientation when Dr. Laurence first came to talk to the Vienna students. He stood in front of the class and reviewed with us the monetary, time, and relational costs of the trip and then he said, "By choosing to come anyway, you made the right choice." For the first time, I felt a peace about the trip. Later, while standing in Vienna gazing at the Schonbrunn palace, I realized that his words were true.
I am not a perfect individual, and I did not handle this trip perfectly. However, I have no regrets. By the grace of God, I learned and grew and experienced, and He looked out for me the whole way. People have said that I am not any different than I was before I left, and I have trouble identifying specific ways that I have changed. But just as Daniel, our beloved travel guide, told us on the day we left Vienna, "Your family won't see the change, and you might not either. But that doesn't mean that something is not different."
I left for Vienna hoping to see the world and grow in the process. What I didn't know is how I would grow. I didn't know how my conidence would increase as I learned to navigate large groups through foreign cities. I didn't know I would learn the significance of living in a small group of people and loving unconditionally, I didn't know I would discover quite so many negative things about myself, but I also found some good surprises in the mix.
I am not capable of truly understanding the implications of this trip, but I pray every day that God will continue to use it to mold me even though I am back home. Coming home has not been a struggle, but a blessing. I am honored to be back among friends and family. Though I love Europe, America is my home. I do know one thing though: Vienna will always be my second home. Roaming around Karlsplatz and Stefansplatz will always be second nature to me. I hope and pray that I can go back one day, but if I can't, I am at peace. After all, Dr. Laurence said it best: by the grace of God, I made the right choice.